Ask HN: Go all-in on AI Boom vs. enjoy parenthood?

Posted by pratchett 12/12/2025

After many years of working hard, my wife and I finally decided to have a kid recently. I am looking forward to spending a lot more time with her, while working just a 9-5. However, the AI boom seems like a short-lived, once in a life-time opportunity. Now I am considering if I should dive in fully even if it means sacrificing time with family?

Options: 1) Joining an AI startup 2) Founding an AI startup 3) Stay at my big-tech role

I make good money at my current role, but I am extremely passionate about the work I do. With the AI boom, there seems to be a lot of great infra, data movement and algorithmic challenges on the table. However, it is also clear that options 1 and 2 seem to require a lot more time commitment than a simple 9-5 job.

There are also financial considerations. If AI affects the SWE job market in a meaningful way, my future salary will be drastically low. Maybe it makes sense to devote myself to work for 3-5 more years and make a lot more money in the short term? I understand that there is also some probability associated with the final amount I walk away with.

Any others thinking about how to approach the AI boom vs leaning in fully to parenthood?

13 points | 25 commentspage 2

VirusNewbie 12/13/2025|

I think you should wait and see how it goes for you. I got an opportunity at big tech right when I was about to have a second kid and I took it, knowing it wold be more stress and hours.

It was worth it for me, not mainly for the money, but because I look forward to work most days. I also look forward to weekends and spending time with my kids though!

If I was doing something I hated for the 'money' though, I'm not sure it would be worth it. I love coming home happy to my kids, even if I'm seeing them a bit less than I would otherwise. I would hate to be coming home from a job I hate.

softwaredoug 12/12/2025||

I’d do the startups only if they’re once in a lifetime opportunities. I’ve seen that work for people with young kids because it would eat them up inside NOT to do it.

But probably not to just “get startup experience”. Having a kid is a time to not upset your routines if you can manage it. Startups have very wide variance in experiences compared to roles at big company in my experience. Just switching jobs would be difficult.

I had a cushy year at a comfortable job when my first kid was born. I did more the founder thing (write a career changing book) when my second kid was born.

eucryphia 12/13/2025||

That day they don’t want to hold your hand while crossing the road, comes around WAY too soon.

You and your partner have already achieved your first life goal as a human, work on the next two, then everything else is a bonus.

Enjoy yourself until it’s time to help with your, hopefully, nine grandchildren.

inesranzo 12/13/2025||

Assuming you're a builder just do 1 and 2 as small side projects, no need to go full on in an industry that is going to crash anyway.

1 and 2 are now trending essentially to 0.

3. Will get harder to get a job in the years to come.

Stay at your role, build a small side project if you can. Don't leave.

karakoram 12/13/2025||

Please keep your big tech job and focus on parenting for now.

Find other ways to go "all-in" in in the AI Boom in different ways like investing, independent consulting etc if possible.

raw_anon_1111 12/12/2025||

1. Most likely will fail and will be underpaying you and offer you illiquid equity that you can’t use.

2. Will also statistically fail and won’t offer you income.

3. Guaranteed money.

AnimalMuppet 12/13/2025||

In addition to what others have said (lots of good advice here), once-in-a-lifetime opportunities come around more often than you expect.

Desafinado 12/15/2025||

"leaning in fully to parenthood"

Hang out with your kid.

rrmdp 12/12/2025||

Spend as much time as possible with your kid. My daughter is 15 y/o, and even I was lucky to spend time with her because I started working remotely 16 years ago my only regret in life is not spending more time with her, one day you realize she is not a kid anymore and you don't understand how happened that fast.

dhruv3006 12/16/2025|

Enjoy Parenthood.